Ask the Octopus

Am in love with O.Paul for speaking (err.. pointing at) the truth.

O.P’s potential has now opened up a world of opportunities and has evoked world interest, creating a huge career opportunity for his brethren.

There’s just one thing I’d like to do with dear O.P post the finals. Place two boxes of his favorite mussel or oyster and Indian flag in one and some random flag in another and seek prediction. If he doesn’t pick, well, he might not be hungry just yet. If he picks, there is hope. We must try it for Cricket world cup. The best thing would be to do away with the matches and simply ask O.P to zero down on the winner. And let him take the cup. With his favorite food of course.

This new branch of ‘science’, Oracology (you heard it here first!) like astrology, numerology, will find a lot of patronage in our country.

Following are few things for which we can apply this science:

1. Stop being scared of a cat crossing your path. Just ask O.P or any of his ‘trained’ kith or kin if you can go where you want to go.

2. Give OP a choice and ask him to select the questions that would appear in the exam. Or why waste the effort. Simply ask him if you’d clear the exam or not. Narrow down the result by further providing score range- if he selects ‘Pass’, ask if you’d score in the range of 50% -70% or over 70%. No more breaking of 101 coconuts and adding up to the cholesterol level of Lord Ganesha.

3. The best use of Oracology will be in marriages. Produce horoscopes or photos. Either by theory of elimination or selection, the correct match will be picked!

4.The ‘parrot josiyam’ will be replaced with ‘octopus-josiyam’. No more card picking by the parrots. The parrots and pigeons can now take a free flight!

Now add more to the list…

Multi-tasking Octopus

PS: Looks like I said it a little too soon. Google seems to know many other ‘Oracology’ already. I cannot take any credit:-))

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11 thoughts on “Ask the Octopus

  1. – The producers of so called block busters can use OP for determining Hit/Flop.. no need to waste money on mindless promotion and what not..

    – Bonus /elevation of job levels at the work place (scary thought na)?

  2. Aamaam.. Mataji’ya marandhuttome! Enna kodumai Vidya idhu.. neerae innoru ettu-seee’ya (octopus’kku thamizh’la enna..?? ha ha ha… mokkai for the day..ensoy..) recommend panreer!

    BTW Octa + Pus eppadi tamiliteration? kodumai illa.. am thinking maybe I should put together a dictionary full of this and gift it to someone healthy to see if they die after reading it..

    • Mataji is seeing a bleak future, what with the tentacled creature gearing up to rule the world!! Do bring out the dictionary soon. For ‘Lokha-kshemam’:)

  3. very interesting KT …..the Op and th multi tasking ..creative and timely,,,
    wish our folks have not taken this seriously
    ..
    can we expect a octo annanda .. preparing to get going ..three cheers ..
    anyways ..when we have patrons …in large numbers for ants..parrots…elephants and many more ..this octo…its indeed rare and more european….why not again a british raj in this line also…cheers

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