A sequel to my earlier post on the KISS formula for South Indian weddings..
Looks like the ‘arranged marriage’ system is here to stay for a while and has been ‘working’ for many Indians… Its not about the type of marriage, but the system that I consider is flawed and too complex to correct it quickly! I’d like the whole ‘system’ to undergo a slight metamorphosis. Am ready to field the brickbats coming my way, and here is the list. I will implement this for my children if I really have a say and am recording it here for posterity lest Alzheimer’s seizes me during old age!
1. Match the blood group of the girl and guy. In fact, a complete health report will be good. Sounds too stiff? I know 3 different instances where one of the partners had a psychic disorder. Only one case came to light before marriage.
2. As a follow-up to the above, a thorough background check on either side saves a lot of heartache. Instead of relying on the ‘acquaintances’ feedback, trust a good agency and entrust the job to them. Inquire with folks in the workplace, and keep it an open affair. If someone is going to decline your offer of marriage on this grounds, then the ‘match’ isn’t worthy!
3. Abandon ‘horoscope’ matching. Going by that kind of ‘match making’, every such marriage must be at least 50- not out! There are frequent knock-outs despite all the metrics matching!
4. With the above ‘tests’ cleared, the guy and gal must meet sans supervision:) And meet a few times before giving the relationship a ‘GO’.
5. Have said this before and am saying it again; a half-a-day wedding with all the expenses shared by both the sides. No frills, no fury, no tension, no blame games specially involving food:)…. A chill, fun marriage.
6. Preferably, impose ban on gifts or selectively ban the following few items:)
*The usual ‘Gajalakshmi’ plated momentos
Feel free to add more to the list..
7. All the thalai pandigais (for the uninitiated: it means all the festivals in the first year of wedding) must be co-hosted without attaching the pandigai-seer:)
8. Impose strict ban on general junta inquiring on the ‘plans’ directly or indirectly and save yourself the trouble of having to wear that plastic smile for too long.
Go on and share your views that can transform a largely misoneistic outlook to the one that is always ready and open to change and understands that it is the only constant:)