A watchman’s woes

Varun’s best friends in our apartments happen to be the two watchmen, Raman and Neelakantan, who take turns watching. Raman is over 65yrs old and the other man is around 40. The two men find Varun to be a nice entertainment material and don’t seem to mind anything he does, however nasty or bratty it gets!

1.Varun with his hands clasped behind, to Raman:

“Enna Raman, nethu ungala kanom” -What Raman, did not see you around yesterday. Emulating his grandpa in action and words.

2. Another day. Raman is clearing the cobwebs on the terrace 3 floors above. Varun is downstairs near the gate yelling out:

“Watchman, enge irukeenga? inge seekiram vaanga..” -Watchman, where are you? pls come here soon. Calls him several times with some panic in his voice. Raman hurries down concerned.. The brat has his right arm stuck inside his t-shirt. He says:

“Look here! Oru kai kanom!” – Look, one arm is missing!

3. Yet another day. Varun runs to Raman and begs him to lend his ears. He has a secret to share.

“Oru secret” – A secret.

4. Varun to Neelakantan, the other watchman:

“Enna thalaiva, saapteengala”- Thalaiva is slang for Lord.. Did you eat? N addresses the brat thus. So they end up calling each other so!

5. Another day. Am returning from work and just about to enter the gate. N is walking backwards towards the gate asking,

N: Idhu podhuma- Is this enough?
Varun: Innum back – Go back a little more
N: Ippo?
Varun: Innum back. Yes! Ippo bowling pannunga. – Further back. Yes, Now bowl.

The two are playing cricket.

6. Varun tells N that he’ll dress like a batman and come down again. Opens a draw in my dressing table, pulls out the kajal stick. The forehead, upper lip, lower jaw, the cheeks are thickly coated with layers and layers of kajal. He goes down with so much kala-tika and announces the batman’s arrival at every open door in our apartments.

To a surprised N, he explains thus: My mother wears kajal. Implying, he did it because his mother too does. He doesn’t think it necessary to clarify that I don’t exactly wear it like he does!

Remind me to post about his cringe-worthy deed at a wedding reception..


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